Episode Summary
Relying on motivation to reach your goals is like trying to paddle a tiny kayak across the ocean — it’s exhausting, slow, and you’ll probably never make it.
In this episode, Roy shares real-life coaching stories — including one from his time working in addiction rehab — that reveal both sides of motivation: the spark that gets you started, and the wildfire that can burn you out. You’ll learn why motivation is unreliable (and sometimes dangerous), and discover the real game-changer for lasting success: habit.
Roy walks you through the science of habit formation, practical strategies to make habits stick, and how to build “guardrails” to protect yourself from burnout — even if you tend to push too hard.
Today’s episode is my follow-up to this article on the “Aging Well Firefighter” Substack.
Key Topics Covered
The kayak metaphor: why motivation alone won’t get you to your goal
The story of “N” — fired up with motivation, but never showed up
When motivation turns toxic: replacing one obsession with another in recovery
“Jay’s” transformation from extreme workouts to sustainable fitness habits
The science of habit formation (and why the “21 days” myth is wrong)
Three steps to building lasting habits: Anchor, Simplify, Track
Practical “guardrails” for people who tend to overtrain or push too hard
Memorable Quotes
“Motivation is a spark. Habit is the engine.”
“Sometimes motivation isn’t just unreliable — it’s dangerous.”
“Habits are like taking that kayak out of the ocean and dropping it into a river with a current. You still have to paddle, but now the water’s working with you.”
“The goal isn’t to see how much you can take — it’s to build something you can keep doing for years.”
Call to Action
This week, pick one habit you want to build. Start small. Anchor it to something you already do. Make it easy. Track it. And if you tend to push too hard, build in guardrails to protect yourself.
Got questions, ideas, or a story to share? Reach out — Roy would love to hear from you and might even feature your story on a future episode.
Connect with Roy
Instagram: @roysmalley.us
Facebook: @roysmalley.us
LinkedIn: roysmalley
Linktree: www.roysmalley.us
Subscribe & Follow
If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe to The Aging Well Firefighter on Substack, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss a new story, strategy, or insight. And if you found value here, please leave a review - then share this episode with a friend or fellow first responder who could use a little habit-building inspiration.
Until next time… Fight Wisely, Age Bravely!
